Ice Angels

If Edward Scissorhands lived out here we might get some snow as he would dance and scissor ice and shit making big ice dicks and ice pussies with over sized clits. Edward Scissorhands is the shit, poor misunderstood soul. Edward was a normal young lad frolicking around the mansion grounds running with his scissors as he always did. His days were filled with killing cats and cutting up furniture, you see he wasn't always the innocent, wounded character we all know and love. He was a deviant, mean and evil little shit, always cutting the old mans moustache funny as he slept and chopping off dogs ears...that is until one day. When Little Edward was 13 he discovered a stiffness in his knickerbockers and it excited his curiosity. Being the little shit he is he cut a hole in his britches and out popped weeman. Little Edward was fascinated he always liked to kill the cats in the neighborhood, but he heard the neighborhood boys talking about killing kittens while they were looking at some sort of magazine with naked ladies in it. Edward knew that killing kittens had to be more fun than killing kats so he gave it a snip, but there was no fun. Poor little Edward had cut his wiener clean off. Killing kittens was not fun, and no more would be killing cats, or any of the other mischievous things he was accustomed to doing. Poor little Edward grew up that day and became the Edward Scissorhands we love to this day and you know the rest of the story.